Even to the best of us, even to those of us who are dating, (hate you) or are married (hate you most), we feel lonely. I can speak from experience because approximately 6 minutes ago I was lying facedown on my floor chanting, “Why doesn’t anyone want me.” This is a prime example of wanting to be wanted but not wanting to want. If I haven’t lost you yet, if you’ve been able to keep up with my borderline psychotic thought process, I ask you to please not call a depression hotline on me or anything. It’s just one of your run of the mill sad days that requires a little pointless wallowing.
It’s easy to sing “Someday my prince will come” but much harder to wait without waiting. By wait without waiting I mean to live your life without secretly hoping and waiting for someone to notice and love you and make it all worthwhile. Excuse me while I break this record, but contrary to popular belief, the best days of your life don’t have to involve a significant other. Sure, it’s some people’s destiny to fall in love at 14 and get hitched at 20 but just because that’s where they find their bliss doesn’t mean you’ll find yours there. We have to learn to look at our future spouse as a missing piece to the 1000 piece puzzle instead of half of the entire puzzle. He won’t complete you. She won’t make you a better person.
Being in a relationship so you can feel complete is the supreme form of selfishness. Being single doesn’t mean you have to hate Valentine’s Day, tweet passive aggressive comments about couples, or watch P.S. I Love You while eating an entire pack of Oreo’s (it was just one time, ok). But it does mean you have to grow up a lot quicker. Personally, I’m almost 19 and I have my eye on a month long tour of Europe next summer. Would it be nice to have an American arm candy man along with me? Probably. Would it be equally as nice to see the European sights with a group of new exciting people? Definitely.
It’s not a race! And even if it was, everyone doesn’t run at the same pace. We can’t all come in first. Some people’s adventure of choice is marriage-and it truly is an adventure. But before you look at what you have and compare it to what they have, remember, adventures come in all shapes and sizes (like people). Just because yours isn’t like someone else’s it doesn’t make it any less right.