Have you ever had a class where you would leave with a constant rotation of confused “What the heck?”-like phrases running through your head? Because I need only look back on my 8 o’clock class to remember this week’s biggest “What is the world coming to?” moment. Sorry to confirm some of the stereotypes but going to a community college does entail a lot of stupidity. The amount of people who think “library” is synonymous with “nap room” or “crank my tunes room” is pretty reflective of modern American education. So in my Speech class, which I actually really love because I’m that one annoying girl who always volunteers to present first, there are some interesting characters.
We have the meatheads, my affectionate name for gym buffs (buff, no pun intended), who without fail will always be drinking a wheatgrass protein shake or eating a granola bar (more like grossola bar). Then there’s the one outspoken opinion-on-everything guy. Don’t even get me started on the my-muscles-are-always-sore-let-me-make-you-feel-guilty-for-not-working-out-ever girl who sits next to me. NO I STILL DON’T KNOW HOW MUCH I CAN BENCH PRESS and YES IT WOULD TAKE ME THREE DAYS TO RUN A MILE. Sheesh. And then there’s my professor. Like I already said, I really love this class. I feel the most comfortable here and I’m rarely tempted to sleep even though it’s 8 am. That being said, imagine a sailor. No, a pirate. A sailor turned pirate who did hard time in prison for, I don’t know, stabbing some lady with a knife. He gets out of prison and meets up with his bros (brethren?), how do you imagine he talks? Does imaginary pirate felon use greet his friends with “Hip hip cheerio!” or does he use more choice words? What you imagine his vocabulary to be like, that is near what my Speech teacher’s is like.
Now I know what you’re thinking (channeling my inner Professor Xavier)! She’s a speech teacher, she shouldn’t talk like a sailor/pirate/stabber/felon. Ah, but the world is changing my friends. All words are now fair game. So today our class discussion was on the delightful subject of language. Or as I have dubbed it, Show How Gansgsta (sorry mom) You Are Day. I wonder how many swear words Jane Austen heard in her life. Because though I may never near her achievements in anything else, I am fairly certain I have passed her up in that respect. Do I have more street cred? Probably not.
People swear, I get it. And most people will disagree with me when I say this. There are other more efficient ways to let people know how you feel. I’ve learned that “Sticks and stones may break my bones but words will never hurt me” is more accurately written, “Sticks and stones may break my bones but certain words will always make me blush.”